US

US

BREAKING: $244 MILLION CONVERSION SECRETS REVEALED!

BREAKING: $244 MILLION CONVERSION SECRETS REVEALED!

DEVASTATING TECHNIQUES THAT TRIPLE OR QUADRUPLE THE NUMBER OF LEADS AND SALES YOUR WEBSITE GENERATES, GUARANTEED!

Don’t spend another cent until you’ve tried this.

YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG

Right now your sales content is about as useful as a bag of sand in a desert storm.

We’re willing to bet that the sage advice from your “marketing guru” is to spend more money on more material rather than looking into the campaigns that you’re already running.

For amateurs there is no looking back, they’re too busy looking forward to all the money they’re scamming out of you. 😱

You’ve repeatedly shelled out that hard-earned moola that you could’ve spent more wisely on booze and good times.💥

And why wouldn’t you?

Your business is your baby, right?

And you gotta spend money to make money, right?

People tell themselves this, but the truth is, results are all that matter. You swallow those cliche lines in an effort to help you sleep at night.

But you know what really helps you sleep better?

Sleeping on piles of money.

Sleeping on the successes of the day.

YOUR ADS CAMPAIGNS ARE TREADING WATER
YOU HAVE VIRTUALLY ZERO ROI
YOUR SHIFTING FROM ONE CAMPAIGN TO ANOTHER WITHOUT THINKING THINGS THROUGH
YOU’RE TRYING THIS YOURSELF
YOUR MARKETING SUPER GURU IS CONSTANTLY SUGGESTING NEW CAMPAIGNS

Professionals do not look forward without looking back first.

Take a look around you, who doesn’t look at their existing game plan and try to tweak it for better results before moving on to a new strategy?

Losers, that’s who. Sorry, but it’s true. 👏

The loser’s mindset is automatically positioned to the next best thing, not making the existing plan the best it can be. 😖

When we’re sitting in the conference room banging out strategy sessions we aren’t reinventing the wheel, we’re building on past successes.

Searching every nook and cranny for that nugget of gold we might have missed or overlooked in our quest for results and ROI.

HERE’S WHY YOUR STRATEGY IS STEALING EVERY GOOD MEMORY OUT FROM UNDER YOU.

We hope you’re sitting for this one, it’s gonna be a tough one for you to get through…

When you’re looking at your marketing budget and your estimated ROI you have fixed goals and expectations in mind for where your business is going and hopefully growing.

Now, the reality is cruel sometimes, and “marketing whizz kids” are even crueler.

Your latest campaign doesn’t yield the results you were promised and your projections are in tatters.

Cue dimly lit chamber music…

You whizz kid looks at you with a straight face and tells you he has a different plan and it’s going to cost you $2500 more on top of the work he just shat the bed with.

Sound familiar?

Yip, your whiz kid is working you like a side hustle.

You’re not a priority and you’re not worth understanding.

And honestly neither is his work, he isn’t willing to get down in the blood-soaked pits of the arena, look at the carnage he has created, and search for meaning in his mediocrity.

Put the build-a-bear down, it’s not over yet.

Conversion Rate Optimization isn’t for the faint of heart.

Digital marketing agencies like to throw that word around, we can optimize this and that for you.

Or they end up doing is optimizing their already heavily-lined bank accounts.

And what do you get?

Nothing, a few nice meetings that make you feel important, perhaps.

“I’m a business owner, look at me.”

“I’m going to be the next -”

You’re going to be the next mark on your whiz kid marketer’s hit list.

SOMETHING ABOUT CRO THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW…

We’ve grown so tired of rolling up our sleeves and doing really hard work that we don’t wear sleeves to the office anymore. It’s just tang tops or shirtless. 😎

Real CRO is done in the war room. No coffee breaks, no mocha chai teas, and no tears, well not in front of your fellow gladiators.

We’re talking hours of grueling data analytics, critically evaluating your current and previous marketing campaigns for defects and areas for improvement.

You can’t do that successfully without also thoroughly reevaluating your demographic and their pain points.

Remember, your campaign has to have a clear and effective CTA…

If there isn’t a ninja throwing shuriken-shaped pain points at their vitals then you’ve failed to make your business the only cure and solution to their problems.

But wait, my campaigns are pulling in some conversions, isn’t that a success story?

By your standards, you should probably watch the Titanic then for a true success story.

So what are we aiming for when it comes to conversion rates?

The sky, seriously, the higher the better. There is no minimum projection.

You are settling for mediocrity if you’re happy with anything that speaks to average or less.

Real CRO is about refining what you already have and enhancing results.

If you’re trying this yourself, kudos everyone wants a little DIY in their lives.

WHAT IS YOUR PROFESSION!?

But you don’t do open heart surgery on yourself, you go to a professional.

CRO is open-heart surgery on your business, do not attempt to recreate these scenes at home.

Just a little glimmer of what we cook up for our clients in the arena.

UNDERPINNING WHAT’S ACTUALLY GOING WRONG FOR YOU AND HOW TO FIX IT
IN DEPTH STRATEGIC ANALYSIS OF YOUR CURRENT AND PAST CAMPAIGN OFFERINGS
SEO ANALYSIS
DETAILED WEBSITE TRAFFIC ANALYTICS
HARNESSING THE POWER OF THE SUN AND TRANSPORTING YOU TO #1 IN GOOGLE SEARCHES
THE TRUTH, IT’S ACTUALLY A REALLY USEFUL TOOL, AND WE AREN’T SHY TO USE IT
METRICS, REAL QUANTIFIABLE NUMBERS THAT CAST A LIGHT ON THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY

THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE, HURT A LITTLE MAYBE BUT WORTH IT

Unlike your solo part-time web guru, we’re not shy to tell you how to be better.

Hell, we tell ourselves hourly, sometimes even seconds after we’ve just convinced ourselves we’re great.

You have a captive audience of less than 3% of your website visitors, and then an average conversion rate on an entire campaign of between 1 and 2%.

Your farting at thunder 💨 if you’re hoping to get a lucky break and just make it on to the top of a Google search list. 😂

Google is the beast that guards the gates to the kingdom of success.

You have to overcome it or you’ll be lost forever, devoured like so many before you. 💀

It’s vast, seemingly endless and it doesn’t fear you or need you.

There will be no tears shed for the rotting corpse of a business that it leaves behind once it’s done with you.

But a crack team of gladiators will give you more than a fighting chance.

We’ve got the keys to the kingdom!

I mean, our gladiators have forgotten more about CRO than you or your marketing guru buddy have even learned at this stage.

NO RUBBER STAMPING HERE

Every inch of the work we do is guaranteed to give you an ROI that you sing to momma about. 💰

We guarantee it.

Or you don't pay. That’s right, gladiators only get the reward when they win, otherwise, they’re lying there lifeless, no glory, no fame.

When you get in the fighting pit with us, we’re honor-bound to see you through to glory.

Working with us, you’ll get a CRO that…